I had an amazing Fall Break back in Chicago, but my time with Nancy deserves its own blog post.
Her shower was on my first day back, and it was lovely. Mostly uneventful. Except that I accidentally got her a lesbian wedding card. I missed the "S" at the end of Brides! We both started laughing so hard when she opened it and everyone thought we were crazy.
I also presented Nancy with a quilt that my mom and I collaborated on. This was the first and probably last time we will work together. There was some conflict, but I'm happy with how it turned out, and Nancy seemed pleased with it, too.
"Hell yeah!" I eagerly climbed to the top and posed for a photo, then started complaining loudly. "My fat ass is literally oozing over the sides of this slide..." My rant was cut short when I noticed someone walking down the road behind Nancy's car. It was the sweet old man, carrying his fishing pole.
I immediately doubled over, laughing so hard I was crying. Nancy cracked up, too, without even being sure of the reason. Finally she was able to gasp out, "He's behind me, isn't he?" That poor man probably went home and complained to his wife, "These loud, foul-mouthed women totally ruined my wilderness experience."
These moments are typical of the time I spend with Nancy Effing Novak.
What a great day.
I also presented Nancy with a quilt that my mom and I collaborated on. This was the first and probably last time we will work together. There was some conflict, but I'm happy with how it turned out, and Nancy seemed pleased with it, too.
We also got to spend a day together and go explore Franklin Creek State Park. Nancy always likes the idea of hiking, but the reality is a different story. And unfortunately, I missed the part of the hike description that said there were no bridges at the river crossings. Nancy looked like she wanted to stab me when we arrived at the first one.
After we were both safely across, I had this moment of thankfulness for the fall day and being with Nancy. As the wind swirled leaves around me, I said, "I'm so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers."
Nancy glared. "F-- you and the f--ing places you take me, Erin."
But I knew she'd appreciate it later.
As we hiked along, we traded insults. Loud ones. Full of colorful language. We hadn't seen a single soul on this hike so far, so we were confident that we had the place to ourselves.
"I wish a horde of butterflies would just come along and carry you off!" she yelled.
"You're such an a--hole!" I responded.
And then we rounded a corner and spotted a sweet looking old man fishing.
We were SO embarrassed and apologized profusely. He was gracious about our loud interruption, and we continued hiking quickly and quietly.
We arrived back and Nancy's car and drove towards the exit of the park. Suddenly, Nancy slammed on the brakes and pulled over into the grass. "Look, Erin, a metal slide! You love those!"
Nancy glared. "F-- you and the f--ing places you take me, Erin."
But I knew she'd appreciate it later.
As we hiked along, we traded insults. Loud ones. Full of colorful language. We hadn't seen a single soul on this hike so far, so we were confident that we had the place to ourselves.
"I wish a horde of butterflies would just come along and carry you off!" she yelled.
"You're such an a--hole!" I responded.
And then we rounded a corner and spotted a sweet looking old man fishing.
We were SO embarrassed and apologized profusely. He was gracious about our loud interruption, and we continued hiking quickly and quietly.
We arrived back and Nancy's car and drove towards the exit of the park. Suddenly, Nancy slammed on the brakes and pulled over into the grass. "Look, Erin, a metal slide! You love those!"
"Hell yeah!" I eagerly climbed to the top and posed for a photo, then started complaining loudly. "My fat ass is literally oozing over the sides of this slide..." My rant was cut short when I noticed someone walking down the road behind Nancy's car. It was the sweet old man, carrying his fishing pole.
I immediately doubled over, laughing so hard I was crying. Nancy cracked up, too, without even being sure of the reason. Finally she was able to gasp out, "He's behind me, isn't he?" That poor man probably went home and complained to his wife, "These loud, foul-mouthed women totally ruined my wilderness experience."
These moments are typical of the time I spend with Nancy Effing Novak.
What a great day.
Comments