I've been thinking a lot about karma. Lately, it seems like the "bad guys" have been winning. I would like to present three break-up scenarios.
Scenario #1:
Couple is married. Guy decides he wants a divorce. Refuses counseling. A few years later, girl finds out he has moved back to his home state with a former coworker that the girl was suspicious of during the marriage. She appears to have a ring on her finger. Guy is manipulating women and getting exactly what he wants, while the girl has had to mourn the loss of the things she hoped she'd have right now (marriage, kids), rebuild her life, and start over in her search for a husband.
Scenario #2:
Girl moves in with her high school sweetheart, who turns out not to be such a sweetheart. Girl leaves him after he gets violent with their dog. She takes the dog and moves back in with her parents. She is left in charge of finding renters for the condo and the responsibilities that come with being a landlord. All this while trying to regain her self-confidence and undo the damage this man has done to her self-esteem. In the meantime, guy gets a promotion, moves out of state, buys a BMW, takes fabulous vacations with his new girlfriend, and continues to screw over the girl financially in regards to the condo.
Scenario #3:
Guy tells girl he loves her and wants to marry her. Girl thinks he is "the one" and moves across the country for him. Guy was all talk, no action and is also still attached to his ex-girlfriend. Drama ensues, and girl is left with physical and emotional scars. Girl cries herself to sleep and drags herself to work, just trying to get through the day. She slowly tries to let go of the hopes she'd had for this relationship and considers deleting her secret Pinterest wedding board. Meanwhile, the guy spends his days surfing and drinking beer. He does not work; he is independently wealthy.
It is so frustrating to try to live your life with integrity, but still see the bad guys getting everything they want. I know logically that things can't be as good as they appear. Guys #1 & 3 clearly have private demons and are deeply unhappy. And Guy #2 had the nerve to text the girl a picture of the BMW keys to let her know he's made it in life... If that is the means by which he measures happiness, I feel very sad for him.
I also know that this feeling is nothing new. So many of the Psalms are David begging God to take out his enemies and wondering why they always seem to win. I've thought to myself, "Why am I letting this matter to me? Who cares if the other person is happy or unhappy? I only have control of my life, and I'm going to choose happiness." I remind myself of that Ghandi quote about how being angry is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I think about Joyce Meyer joking about all the energy we waste on being mad, when half the time the other person doesn't even know (or care) how I feel. I'm only hurting myself.
One of the girls says that it should be enough for us to know that we are godly women. I try to "act justly and love mercy and walk... with God." (And I often fail spectacularly.) But the intention is there. And I have to believe it will pay off. Even if I don't get everything I want in life, I can have the satisfaction of knowing that I did my best to love people and do the right thing. But... a clear conscience versus spending your days surfing? Not gonna lie, there are days I'd choose the beach over integrity.
I just keep praying that Love really does win, and that the three women above will be happy and blessed.
Scenario #1:
Couple is married. Guy decides he wants a divorce. Refuses counseling. A few years later, girl finds out he has moved back to his home state with a former coworker that the girl was suspicious of during the marriage. She appears to have a ring on her finger. Guy is manipulating women and getting exactly what he wants, while the girl has had to mourn the loss of the things she hoped she'd have right now (marriage, kids), rebuild her life, and start over in her search for a husband.
Scenario #2:
Girl moves in with her high school sweetheart, who turns out not to be such a sweetheart. Girl leaves him after he gets violent with their dog. She takes the dog and moves back in with her parents. She is left in charge of finding renters for the condo and the responsibilities that come with being a landlord. All this while trying to regain her self-confidence and undo the damage this man has done to her self-esteem. In the meantime, guy gets a promotion, moves out of state, buys a BMW, takes fabulous vacations with his new girlfriend, and continues to screw over the girl financially in regards to the condo.
Scenario #3:
Guy tells girl he loves her and wants to marry her. Girl thinks he is "the one" and moves across the country for him. Guy was all talk, no action and is also still attached to his ex-girlfriend. Drama ensues, and girl is left with physical and emotional scars. Girl cries herself to sleep and drags herself to work, just trying to get through the day. She slowly tries to let go of the hopes she'd had for this relationship and considers deleting her secret Pinterest wedding board. Meanwhile, the guy spends his days surfing and drinking beer. He does not work; he is independently wealthy.
It is so frustrating to try to live your life with integrity, but still see the bad guys getting everything they want. I know logically that things can't be as good as they appear. Guys #1 & 3 clearly have private demons and are deeply unhappy. And Guy #2 had the nerve to text the girl a picture of the BMW keys to let her know he's made it in life... If that is the means by which he measures happiness, I feel very sad for him.
I also know that this feeling is nothing new. So many of the Psalms are David begging God to take out his enemies and wondering why they always seem to win. I've thought to myself, "Why am I letting this matter to me? Who cares if the other person is happy or unhappy? I only have control of my life, and I'm going to choose happiness." I remind myself of that Ghandi quote about how being angry is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I think about Joyce Meyer joking about all the energy we waste on being mad, when half the time the other person doesn't even know (or care) how I feel. I'm only hurting myself.
One of the girls says that it should be enough for us to know that we are godly women. I try to "act justly and love mercy and walk... with God." (And I often fail spectacularly.) But the intention is there. And I have to believe it will pay off. Even if I don't get everything I want in life, I can have the satisfaction of knowing that I did my best to love people and do the right thing. But... a clear conscience versus spending your days surfing? Not gonna lie, there are days I'd choose the beach over integrity.
I just keep praying that Love really does win, and that the three women above will be happy and blessed.
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