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Stuck in a Rut

Nina and Nancy and I had a scrumptious dinner tonight at People, followed by a drink at Salud. On the way home, they reflected on how much life can change in a year, and how much their lives change from year to year. Several years ago, I could have agreed with this statement. But now, I feel like my life doesn't really change. Life is good, it's just the same. Same job, same apartment, same lack of significant other...

Summertime is always exciting because I'm accomplishing goals and doing whatever I want. This was a perfect summer. But during the school year, I am so predictable. Nothing much happens during the week; I'm not the type that can go out on weeknights. I'm usually just busy with work. By Friday night, I'm so exhausted from the week that I usually just watch a movie and go to bed even earlier than I do on weeknights. Saturday morning I do homework, then hang out with my little sister or clean or something else productive. Saturday night I go to DC's. Sunday is usually spent grading papers, doing laundry, or just relaxing. Doesn't this sound incredibly boring? I'm bored just typing it.

I guess the point is that I feel like year after year is slipping by, and not much is changing. I love the life I've built for myself, and it's not like I want something bad to happen just so I can say my life changed. But when I look back over the past two years that I've had this job, things have been almost exactly the same.

I don't really know why I'm whining about this. What is it that I'm hoping for? It's not like I want to lose my job or my apartment or my friends. I said in that survey that my biggest fear is time, and that's true. I just don't want to waste any of my life. But if things are going to change, I know I need to change them myself. And a drastic change isn't really feasible at this point, since I'm in a master's program here for the next two years. I think I need to just get over this and go to bed.

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