The problem with Phoenix is that there are too many boys.
I've been wanting to go to Whiskey River (the country bar), so my friend Jenny made it a Meetup. Honestly, I was not too excited about this because I just wanted it to be a girls' night out where we could dance and meet guys.
So, there were these two guys there, Derek and Tony. I've hung out with Derek before, and things have been flirty, but I'm not interested. Honestly, I just enjoy flirting. I'm terrible, I know. But I didn't think he was actually into me; I just thought he was a flirt, too. Well, Derek brought his A game last night. He got me out on the dance floor (and he is actually fun to dance with because he knows what he's doing and is a good leader), and was very touchy feely. Meanwhile, when Derek was away from the table, Tony asked if I was into Derek. I told him no, so then Tony was dancing with me and being flirty. I was less than excited about all this attention. There was, however, one advantage. When they played "Boot Scoot Boogie," I got all excited because I wanted to dance, but no one at the bar was line dancing. Both boys were willing to look stupid to dance with me, so I taught them the dance and didn't have to be embarrassed and do it all by myself.
It's hard because for some reason, boys perceive friendliness as "she wants me." So we left the bar and got cheap Mexican food, and Tony (who really is kind of an ass), starts telling me about how he was a communications major and so he's an expert on nonverbal communication and my body language is telling him that I want him. I told him flat out that my body language must be lying because I was not interested. Coincidentally, he had a "family emergency" a few minutes later and left. (My friend Jenny says he's used this excuse before and it's a lie.)
When everyone decided to leave, Derek asked how I'd feel about a ride on his motorcycle. I was torn. I knew it was a bad idea to spend that time alone with him, but I have this love/hate relationship with motorcycles. I think they're terrifying and irresponsible, which just makes them that much more appealing to me. Oh, and I don't wear a helmet. (I think helmets are kind of like condoms.) So it's really just plain stupid for me to go for motorcycle rides.
It was an offer I couldn't refuse. But the problem is, going for a motorcycle ride with a boy is very intimate (at least to me). Your arms are wrapped around him, you have to lean with him and totally trust him, and I rest my head against him and close my eyes. I told him that other drivers must be looking at me thinking I am retarded for real, because I had this big stupid grin on my face the whole time. But at one point I said to him, "I'm just so happy right now." Which was true. Unfortunately, it's statements like that that get me into trouble. (I wish I had been with Ryan; he would've just called me gay.)
So Derek stops the motorcycle on a quiet street where we have a beautiful view of the mountains and the stars, and he starts this conversation about the stars and time and relativity. He seems surprised that I can hold my own in this conversation. (I really hate that people often get the impression that I'm not very bright.) Anyway, this is obviously meant to be a romantic topic. I knew I needed to ruin the moment, so I told him I was about to pee in my pants and went and peed in the bushes. This did not deter him. He kept on talking about the universe and stuff, trying to create this romantic moment. So then I turned the conversation to religion, a very unsexy topic. But this guy would not be distracted. So finally I said we should get going, and went to climb on the bike. He tried to go in for a kiss, but I turned away and so he ended up just kissing me on the forehead. Crisis averted, but still an awkward moment.
So we got back to the bar and I gave him a quick hug and thanked him for the ride. He just looked at me. I could see him struggling to put the pieces together in his head. I had to say something, so I asked if something was wrong. He said, "No, I guess I'm just confused." He totally wanted to kiss me and it just wasn't going to happen. So there was another awkward moment where I acted obvlivious and told him I'd see him soon and quickly got in my car and left.
I feel really guilty. I keep seeing that confused/disappointed look on his face. I need to just tell him I just want to be friends, but that's not an easy conversation to have. Usually I have no problem being open with people, but I feel like I led him on. I'm not sure how to proceed at this point. I'm thinking that maybe I'll ask my friend Jenny to talk to him and make something up about me having feelings for someone back home.
Besides the whole Derek thing, there's also a guy from OkCupid I was supposed to go out with today. We were going to watch football. He had to cancel at the last minute because his tire blew out. I thought he was blowing me off at first, but he wanted to reschedule, and he did seem into me. He was the one who initiated contact and asked me out. So we're going out next Saturday.
I also met a guy at Haley's Halloween party last weekend. He's one of her husband's best friends, and a huge Bears fan. Haley wants us to go out on a double date, which I think would be fun. He seems like a good guy.
I hung out with Daniel last Friday night, but I don't think I'll be seeing him again. I realized I like the idea of him more than I actually like him. And there was an embarrassing incident which cannot be shared on my PG blog, but I don't think he'll be wanting to see me anymore, either.
I never thought I'd say this, but there are just too many guys. And what sucks is that none of them have been guys I'm truly interested in. However, I am having a lot of fun. So I'll stop complaining and enjoy this time, because when it comes to guys, it is flood or drought. And it's definitely raining men in my life right now.
I've been wanting to go to Whiskey River (the country bar), so my friend Jenny made it a Meetup. Honestly, I was not too excited about this because I just wanted it to be a girls' night out where we could dance and meet guys.
So, there were these two guys there, Derek and Tony. I've hung out with Derek before, and things have been flirty, but I'm not interested. Honestly, I just enjoy flirting. I'm terrible, I know. But I didn't think he was actually into me; I just thought he was a flirt, too. Well, Derek brought his A game last night. He got me out on the dance floor (and he is actually fun to dance with because he knows what he's doing and is a good leader), and was very touchy feely. Meanwhile, when Derek was away from the table, Tony asked if I was into Derek. I told him no, so then Tony was dancing with me and being flirty. I was less than excited about all this attention. There was, however, one advantage. When they played "Boot Scoot Boogie," I got all excited because I wanted to dance, but no one at the bar was line dancing. Both boys were willing to look stupid to dance with me, so I taught them the dance and didn't have to be embarrassed and do it all by myself.
It's hard because for some reason, boys perceive friendliness as "she wants me." So we left the bar and got cheap Mexican food, and Tony (who really is kind of an ass), starts telling me about how he was a communications major and so he's an expert on nonverbal communication and my body language is telling him that I want him. I told him flat out that my body language must be lying because I was not interested. Coincidentally, he had a "family emergency" a few minutes later and left. (My friend Jenny says he's used this excuse before and it's a lie.)
When everyone decided to leave, Derek asked how I'd feel about a ride on his motorcycle. I was torn. I knew it was a bad idea to spend that time alone with him, but I have this love/hate relationship with motorcycles. I think they're terrifying and irresponsible, which just makes them that much more appealing to me. Oh, and I don't wear a helmet. (I think helmets are kind of like condoms.) So it's really just plain stupid for me to go for motorcycle rides.
It was an offer I couldn't refuse. But the problem is, going for a motorcycle ride with a boy is very intimate (at least to me). Your arms are wrapped around him, you have to lean with him and totally trust him, and I rest my head against him and close my eyes. I told him that other drivers must be looking at me thinking I am retarded for real, because I had this big stupid grin on my face the whole time. But at one point I said to him, "I'm just so happy right now." Which was true. Unfortunately, it's statements like that that get me into trouble. (I wish I had been with Ryan; he would've just called me gay.)
So Derek stops the motorcycle on a quiet street where we have a beautiful view of the mountains and the stars, and he starts this conversation about the stars and time and relativity. He seems surprised that I can hold my own in this conversation. (I really hate that people often get the impression that I'm not very bright.) Anyway, this is obviously meant to be a romantic topic. I knew I needed to ruin the moment, so I told him I was about to pee in my pants and went and peed in the bushes. This did not deter him. He kept on talking about the universe and stuff, trying to create this romantic moment. So then I turned the conversation to religion, a very unsexy topic. But this guy would not be distracted. So finally I said we should get going, and went to climb on the bike. He tried to go in for a kiss, but I turned away and so he ended up just kissing me on the forehead. Crisis averted, but still an awkward moment.
So we got back to the bar and I gave him a quick hug and thanked him for the ride. He just looked at me. I could see him struggling to put the pieces together in his head. I had to say something, so I asked if something was wrong. He said, "No, I guess I'm just confused." He totally wanted to kiss me and it just wasn't going to happen. So there was another awkward moment where I acted obvlivious and told him I'd see him soon and quickly got in my car and left.
I feel really guilty. I keep seeing that confused/disappointed look on his face. I need to just tell him I just want to be friends, but that's not an easy conversation to have. Usually I have no problem being open with people, but I feel like I led him on. I'm not sure how to proceed at this point. I'm thinking that maybe I'll ask my friend Jenny to talk to him and make something up about me having feelings for someone back home.
Besides the whole Derek thing, there's also a guy from OkCupid I was supposed to go out with today. We were going to watch football. He had to cancel at the last minute because his tire blew out. I thought he was blowing me off at first, but he wanted to reschedule, and he did seem into me. He was the one who initiated contact and asked me out. So we're going out next Saturday.
I also met a guy at Haley's Halloween party last weekend. He's one of her husband's best friends, and a huge Bears fan. Haley wants us to go out on a double date, which I think would be fun. He seems like a good guy.
I hung out with Daniel last Friday night, but I don't think I'll be seeing him again. I realized I like the idea of him more than I actually like him. And there was an embarrassing incident which cannot be shared on my PG blog, but I don't think he'll be wanting to see me anymore, either.
I never thought I'd say this, but there are just too many guys. And what sucks is that none of them have been guys I'm truly interested in. However, I am having a lot of fun. So I'll stop complaining and enjoy this time, because when it comes to guys, it is flood or drought. And it's definitely raining men in my life right now.
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