A friend of mine texted a few weeks ago and wanted to know what I was up to.
(I'm kind of obsessed with Princess Kate.)
"I'm at Olive Garden."
"What?? Who the f--- goes to Olive Garden when they're vagabonding??"
I do. Because I don't give a f---, I do what makes me happy. And yes, I know Olive Garden pasta is basically a step up from Fazoli's, but don't try to pretend like you don't love their salad and breadsticks.
I confess that I am a basic bitch at heart. And this is what happens when basic bitches go vagabonding.
1. You "Shake It Off" with Taylor Swift in a dance party for one at your campsite.
2. Night time camp activities include: hydrating with Korean face masks, pedicures (in blue or green, because those are the trendy colors right now), rereading Twilight, trying out hairstyles you saw on Pinterest, reading the latest issue of US Weekly.
3. Breakfast consists of artisan doughnuts from Blue Star. (You bought extra to take into the wilderness.)
4. Is that an outlet mall? Do they have Ann Taylor Loft? Shop now, hike later.
5. A mid-sized town means you will be dining in style at Olive Garden that night.
6. You drive around until you find a campsite with 3G so you can binge watch "New Girl" on Netflix.
7. Dramatic renditions of "Let It Go" when you are out hiking. Because you are "one with the wind and sky."
8. Most of your sight-seeing and hiking revolves around ideas from the Vagabonding board you created on Pinterest. #pinterestdreamsrealized
9. You start every day by reading Lauren Conrad's latest blog post.
10. Selfies. So. Many. Selfies. Gotta make sure you get the right angle. Then you have to crop it so you don't look fat, and carefully analyze which filter is the most flattering. Finally, you walk around your campsite holding your arm out, trying to get enough reception to post to Instagram.
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